Hail, Go Away

Hail is the worst. In fact, on my official list of weather conditions that are the worst, hail just went right up to number one. Wind used to be at number one, but at least wind mostly doesn’t try to kill you. Hail usually comes in really hot weather, so you run outside because you think it’s raining and you want to cool down, but nope! You just end up bruised, and still hot. Definitely the worst, for sure.

And now, in case hail doesn’t think it has yet earned the number one spot just yet, I need urgent smash repairs for my car. Because how can we make this worse? Oh yeah, let’s beat down while Mack is driving and cause him to ram into a bus shelter! Now I’m having to wait for an appointment, because the mechanic workshops Bentleigh has on offer – the ones that are open, anyway – are all booked out dealing with the hail damage. It’d be nice if it just hailed on me, making me feel all special, but sadly that wasn’t how it worked. Everyone has to deal with this sky-born idiocy.

At the very least, it’s not like hail can get caught in the wheels, because then it melts pretty quickly. Still, I’ve had a quick look and I don’t think my hubcaps are on properly. Great, so, that’s another thing. All of a sudden while I was driving, it was like I was suddenly driving off-road on some magical adventure cross-country, except nope, it was all hail.

I’m starting to have nightmares about it now: I’m going to get my car serviced, except it starts hailing on the way there. My windscreen gets smashed, so I teleport forward in time to after the car servicing, Bentleigh area being a bit of a pain to get around in with a broken windscreen. But my car is a write-off, and sadly, due to Australian law, anyone who has their car written off by hail is restricted to driving a 2002 Mitsubishi Mirage for the rest of their lives.

And then I wake up, and remember that I actually do drive that car, and it’s awful.