The Slide Is High

Allow me to introduce myself. The name’s Bill Kettle, and I’m in the slippery dip business. I’ve designed and constructed slippery dips for just about every application you can think of: public playgrounds, water parks, novelty office spaces and even houses. Yes, houses have slippery dips now, and it’s all thanks to people like me who are shaking up this arena, creating innovation and reimagining the possibilities.

Slippery dips are now emerging in the consciousness of designers as the architectural feature they always have been, and Bill Kettle is here to give the people what they want. Working with leading steel fabricators within Melbourne, I deliver the kind of slippery dips you dreamed of as a kid. Imagine all the complexity and excitement of those ungodly death traps (aka accidents waiting to happen) from the 1980s, combined with the high tech materials and safe, ergonomic design of today’s litigation-proof climbing gyms. Now imagine that, but big enough for a fully grown adult to clamber on. That’s what Bill Kettle’s slippery dips are all about.

When it comes to finding steel suppliers local to Melbourne, my process has been extremely thorough. Some say I’m a control freak, but I don’t know about that. What I am a freak about is building the world’s best slippery dips. I won’t stop until my slippery dips are a global phenomenon. The ultimate dream is for people to be building houses around my designs, rather than the other way around.

Why am I so mad about this? Well, that’s a good question, but I don’t really know what to tell you. Everyone loves a good slippery dip, and I think it’s wrong that they’re seen as just something for the kids. The real answer, though, is that there’s money in it. I believe I’m sitting on a goldmine here, and it’s only a matter of time before the trend takes off and it cracks wide open.